Josh is sitting in a radio station with Larry the Bagel Guy, their hometown DJ. Mary knew Larry from their days in college together. They both attended the university within a couple hour drive of the home town. Josh sat with headphones on as Larry the Bagel Guy was coming back from a rejoin.
“WKRP, Lite FM bringing you today’s hits, with yesterday’s favorites. This is Larry the Bagel Guy with you. That was Amy Grant just now, but here before me, we have a local man running for President! Is that right. Josh Baer.”
“Yes, Larry. That is indeed correct.”
“Josh, please call me Larry the Bagel Guy. What-a, what made you decide to run for President, Josh?”
“Please, Josh Baer. And, well. I recently got fired.”
“Got fired you say, ouch!”
“Yes, Larry. Larry the Bagel Guy. I was recently fired and I was at one of those life changing moments, you know.”
“Life changing moments at 35 years old, we’ve all been there!”
“Well, some of us have. Can’t speak for your younger listeners out there. Anyway, I was with my brother Peter. Big shout out to Peter Baer.”
Larry the Bagel Guy plays a high energy pop beat to accompany the shout out. “Big props to brother Peter out there!”
“Right, big props. We were sitting at the bar having a few drinks and I just thought about how much the current politicians are no good. The system has become corrupted and there are no winners anymore.”
“Big Brother is out to get you, brother.”
“Okay. So, I was thinking these things and how we need to take the power back to the people.”
“Rage Against the Machine!”
“Well, not exactly. We can do this all peacefully. We can sit down and have a discussion about what Americans actually want, not what a news organization tells us what we want. We can talk to Americans. We can poll them. And legitimately poll them. We take direction from the American people. Oh, I get it, Rage Against the Machine, ‘Take the Power Back.’ You are good.”
“Just rifting off of what you give me, Josh Baer. So, you want to run on a platform of giving power to the people? Are you running on a Socialist ticket or, dare I say, a communist ticket?”
“No, sir, not whatsoever. I’m not sure why you would even ask that.”
“Just sounded like you want a collective of people to run the country, sort of the same concept of communism or socialism.”
“That’s not the case at all. The platform I am running on is one in the same that our forefathers ran on. A government for the people, by the people.”
“Are you calling our forefathers communists?” Josh raised an eyebrow and saw Mary on the other side of the glass. She was vehemently shaking her head no. Without hesitation Josh answered.
“No, Larry. I am not, nor will I ever call our forefathers communists. I understand what you are trying to do and how you are trying to spin my words. But, I, Josh Baer, have not nor will I ever say such a thing. What I am saying is that I want to return our country into the ideological masterpiece that Thomas Jefferson, George Washington, Ben Franklin and the rest of the forefathers fought and died for. I want the decisions made by the highest office to be influenced by the masses, not the super rich, not corporate bosses. I want our blood, sweat and tears produce ripe fruit for the future. I want neighbors to treat each other how the would want to be treated. I don’t want coworkers or family members to get into heated arguments anymore because Fox News said this, but MSNBC said this. I want the truth. I want everyone held accountable who has been elected to office. People elected to office share the burden of the people in their district and they should have to answer accordingly. I am searching for the end of partisanship and the beginning of the return to America. I am an American and I want to lead the American people to the dream that we all had as children. Have faith in me and I will guide you.”
“You heard it here on WKRP, folks. We’ll come back with some Bette Midler.” The station went to commercial break and Larry the Bagel Guy took his headphones off and Josh followed suit. “Good fucking luck, nut job.” He said to Josh.
“Nothing, man. I’d be happy to have you on when you get a nomination.”
“Thank you, sir. Really appreciate. Now, if you excuse me, I’m going to have some of the ‘regular’ folks patronize me.” Josh put his headphones down and walked out of the studio. Mary had a smile on and Peter was busy thumbing away on his phone.
“Josh, you did great.” Mary said.
“Thanks. Not sure what really happened in there.”
“You stayed true to the platform and that was good stuff to have out there.”
“And done!” Peter said. “Posted to YouTube.”
“Great!” Josh said. “What’s next?”
TO BE CONTINUED…
Please to enjoy.